My phone died so I had to write this on a piece of paper because I just had to get this out and I'm just so revolted. I'm on a train back to Paris from a school trip with 24 other kids.
First thing is that were I using the cliché terms, I would be a misfit, an outcast. I'm okay with that. I have eight best friends in real like and about a hundred more online and I love them all.
Anyway, this means I don't have a normal group of people I hang out with normally. You know how in movies there's always the mean girls(!) and the awesome less popular girls that everyone roots for? Yeah, well, these are the girls I've been sort of hanging around during this field trip. They're nice, right? They are. Of course they are, there the good guys, they're supposed to be nice.
But I'm sitting here on the sidelines yet again as they flip through our yearbook and through our grade's class photo. I'm hearing them call girls 'pretty' or 'ugly' and guys are 'hot' or 'gross' and I can't believe what I'm listening to. I'm hearing a few of my friends' names and still I say nothing; it's seriously all just a blur of "ugly, pretty, ugly, ugly, ew, hot, gross, pretty".
And they're all laughing about it. "It's just some harmless fun," they'd say, but it's not harmless, not at all. It's hurtful and mean and insulting and derogatory. They act like rating our classmates is normal and the terrifying thing is that it is. Words like 'fat' and 'ugly' are thrown around like they mean nothing. And I'm just sitting here thinking, "these are supposed to be the good guys? What kind of world do we live in that the good guys aren't even good?"
Someone please get me out of here right now because all of this is disgusting and it's making me physically nauseous and I think I'm going to be sick.
Incidents like this remind me why I enjoy being alone. I have tried being social and the verdict stays the same. I dislike it. Whatever made people so judgmental? It must be exhausting, judging people for no reason. Just shut the fuck up and fucking enjoy what privileges you've been given.
First thing is that were I using the cliché terms, I would be a misfit, an outcast. I'm okay with that. I have eight best friends in real like and about a hundred more online and I love them all.
Anyway, this means I don't have a normal group of people I hang out with normally. You know how in movies there's always the mean girls(!) and the awesome less popular girls that everyone roots for? Yeah, well, these are the girls I've been sort of hanging around during this field trip. They're nice, right? They are. Of course they are, there the good guys, they're supposed to be nice.
But I'm sitting here on the sidelines yet again as they flip through our yearbook and through our grade's class photo. I'm hearing them call girls 'pretty' or 'ugly' and guys are 'hot' or 'gross' and I can't believe what I'm listening to. I'm hearing a few of my friends' names and still I say nothing; it's seriously all just a blur of "ugly, pretty, ugly, ugly, ew, hot, gross, pretty".
And they're all laughing about it. "It's just some harmless fun," they'd say, but it's not harmless, not at all. It's hurtful and mean and insulting and derogatory. They act like rating our classmates is normal and the terrifying thing is that it is. Words like 'fat' and 'ugly' are thrown around like they mean nothing. And I'm just sitting here thinking, "these are supposed to be the good guys? What kind of world do we live in that the good guys aren't even good?"
Someone please get me out of here right now because all of this is disgusting and it's making me physically nauseous and I think I'm going to be sick.
Incidents like this remind me why I enjoy being alone. I have tried being social and the verdict stays the same. I dislike it. Whatever made people so judgmental? It must be exhausting, judging people for no reason. Just shut the fuck up and fucking enjoy what privileges you've been given.
